Lou Said what?!

Good sirs,

May I, gently no doubt, take a moment of your precious time, which will surely evaporate before you know it, in order that I may muse on such strenuous nonesuch?

Much obliged, to be sure.

I started this blog some 7 months ago in order to - well, I don't know why I started it. Nonetheless, I decided to start it once more, to make a travel blog of sorts for those whose communication with me will most likely be minimized in the coming months, as I spend a bit of my life on the Greek island of Paros, from Sept 09 to June '10.

I guess that makes this Phase 1: Preparation. Which is pretty pointless because I can still communicate with those who would have me.

I propose this blog to be - well, I still really don't know. Philosophical onanism, personal ballyhoo, etc. etc.

And a dream journal! I truly honestly have decided to devote my life to studying philosophy, just exploring the nature of reality and other such trivialities. And dreams are fun. Consciousness studies really interests me, and I've decided, in a substance-less environment (for now), to explore the other dimensions if they truly exist. I suppose that could be one point of this. It helps to get this stuff out, and I do keep a journal, but perhaps this will be a happier medium, especially for the few of my associates who may be concerned (uh, yeah.). 

Anywho, I started with some binaural beats in order that I may attempt to exercise brainwave entrainment.  

Here's is the first part of Exploration A, and may you excuse the poor quality of the writing? It's from my private journal, which doesn't really call for any type of erudition. 

Exploration A.1

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

5:27 pm

Dream Journal Day 1: 5/6/09

Audio: BMV Series 1: Trance/Lucid Dreaming Induction

Today a new side revealed itself in this schizophrenic journal of mine. Besides a Dear Diary confessional, philosophic onanism, and poetic ballyhoo, this journal will now be used as a dream journal as well.

I decided to take a nap around 3:30; I also decided to use some of the new audio I downloaded, called Brainwave Mind Voyages. Sounds like new-age mumbo jumbo, but it involves brainwave entrainment, which is mostly scientifically viable. It basically involves inducing various brainwaves, such as delta (deep sleep), etc. You can practically put your mind (and by extension your body) into a delta state, and yet still be fully conscious. It essentially induces a state of meditation (truly learned meditators, when scientifically tested, are in delta [deep sleep] mode when they meditate. impressive, to say the least). [Side note: Ken Wilber has proven this, if you look it up. he can actually change his brainwaves by meditating, sometimes with his eyes even open.]

Supposedly this can lead all sorts of spiritual shit; I decided not to focus on that, and not get ahead of myself, but instead focus on the slightly more objective effects. Or at least, the effects that can be proven (whatever), or that can be put into more specific words. This isn't meant to be some scientific experiment-hypothesis bullshit either; I'm just writing it down how I remember it, how I saw it, how I felt it, what I did, etc.

So I set my computer on the bed, poppd in my head phones, turned the playlist on (BMV Series 1: Lucid Dreaming). I picked Lucid Dreaming because it fascinates me, and because it was made for sleeping (some of the series can be used for simple meditation or relaxation or whatever; not necessarily sleeping). 

I won't describe the audio itself (because it's hard to describe), but rather, the effects. First, we should clarify: lucid dreaming is when you're aware that you're dreaming, and thus, in theory, can completely control your dreams and what happens in them. Swank. In this state, your body is asleep, but your mind is awake (when it should be asleep, like in normal dreaming). Something like that, anyhow. Eventually I dozed off, had a very short dream about spitting into the sink, which was surprisingly vivid, I woke up. I think. 

Well, it's weird. You know that feeling when an arm or a leg falls asleep for being too stationary or whatever? It was like, all over. And I couldn't move. At all. It was like sleep paralysis, except not really terrifying. Just weird. Trey and I discussed this one time, but I don't think we were on the same page; I think this is exactly what he was talking about, because we were talking about lucid dreaming. I'll look it up later. 

I was awake, though, fully aware and conscious, a little confused (it's a little new to me after all), and I couldn't feel my body. It wasn't quite an OBE, or maybe it was; regardless, I couldn't really feel my body. And I couldn't move it. Like I said, it was a little like sleep paralysis, except you're not completely aware when that happens, and it's terrifying. This wasn't terrifiying at all.

So in this state, as my body was asleep, and I was aware, I tried to doze off again, so the whispering in my ear "I will be fully aware the next time that I dream" would become true. I guess I was too curious and/or confused to fall asleep again, so I laid there, stiff and aware, until the audio stopped. (I forgot to set to 'repeat' and I couldn't really do it then). What's strange is that I could open my eyes, but nothing else. I was facing a clock, and it was 4:30 (an hour later). I set my alarm on my cell phone, and held it in my hand as I fell asleep; I coudn't feel it at all. 

I had to snap myself out of it. It was a lot like snapping yourself out of sleep paralysis, but I wasn't panicking. l just had to focus a bit. I had to pinch myself to make sure that wasn't part of the dream.

I was a little weirded out after that, for lack of a better expression. I tried taking a normal nap (I had planned to sleep 2 hours), but I couldn't fall asleep after that. I had about 4 hours of sleep last night, so I'm a little tired today. And normally a 1 hour nap wouldn't be much, but I felt - the only way I can describe it - refreshed. Like I just had a perfect 3 hour long nap or something, completely in sync with my sleep cycle. Felt just like that, and it had only been one hour. And I felt a little surreal after that, as if I might have still been dreaming. 

I'm pretty skeptical about all this, but for an experiment like that, I'm pretty surprised it produced immediate results. I'd still like to experiment further with it - get used to lucid dreaming, try some of the other sets (meditation, etc.). Then maybe I can move on into the spiritual realm, experiment with OBEs and astral projections and whatnot. Very skeptical about that stuff too, of course, but at the very least, I can learn to lucid dream with ease. That could be fun.

2:43 am (Thursday, i guess).

Tried it again. Exact same procedure, exact same results. I feel I'm getting closer though.

I should also note that I tried the same procedure last night, but I was too tired to really concentrate on the guided voice. I also figured out that I should keep sleeping, and that lucid dreaming would probably happen while I'm dreaming (how 'bout that), and not during the actual audio contemplation. Still, I did manage to put my body to sleep while my mind remained aware, which is a strange experience, to say the least, but it's the proper practice of sorts for the real thing. I think.

The interesting thing about all this is that it's pretty scientific. Whatever that means. At the very least, the binaural beats certainly are. I'm pretty skeptical, so that says something. An extraordinary experience, hopefully soon to be an ordinary one.

Be kind to yourself.